Doing it right

As a mom, I think sometimes we try to overcompensate for our shortcomings or perceived shortcomings. However, I am recently trying to come to terms that I am really okay as a mom.
With everything that has happened in the past month, I have been sort of a lazy mommy. The kids have gotten pizza more than usual. They have watched more tv than they really should, and I have more than once let them play way too much Minecraft so I could snooze on the couch. Normally, I feel guilty. However, my kids keep telling me I am doing a good job. While we haven’t been having the most stellar of summers, and I am pretty sure that my daughter is not going to complete her entire list which is loosely based on “Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer,”  I think that maybe I need a reality check that says I am not perfect, but that is okay. At the end of the day, the kids are fed, and they go to bed with smiles on their faces.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the whole supermama drama, and I know I have written about it before. However, I am too tired to link the posts right now. We hear about the moms that try to do it all, and when we can’t be just like them, sometimes it is hard not to feel like a failure.
My kids know I am hurting…mentally and physically. I try not to cry in front of them. I don’t talk much, but they know. They know Mommy doesn’t feel up for playdates most of the time or for going outside the house. However, I have told them that while Mommy is not much fun now, I will be up for things eventually. And while they sometimes drive me batty, especially since my husband has been gone for three weeks now, they are good kids and more understanding than I give them credit.
So next time you are reading another mama’s Facebook status or feeling bad that you had cereal for dinner, take a mental step back and look at your kids. Are they clean and fed? Are they happy? Okay then, you are doing it right.



  1. Delia
    July 2, 2013 at 6:56 am

    Thanks Lisa. I needed this. I have really been struggling with this lately.

    • bearhaven
      July 2, 2013 at 8:49 pm

      I think a lot of us do Delia. We all want the best for our kids, and sometimes we need to realize we are ok and they are too 🙂

  2. Steph A
    July 17, 2013 at 10:50 pm

    This is SUCH a great reminder – and I am so sorry for what you are going through. I think it is good, as you said, to ask ourselves, “Our our kids needs taken care of?” Sometimes that’s the best we can do. Sometimes we need the focus on US – to heal, to overcome. Then we can turn back our focus on our kids! Best of luck, friend.

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