The Long Distance Family Experience

I have decided to start a weekly post of my family’s experience of having a long-distance relationship with my husband who is currently a well-site geologist. I am doing this partly as a way to share with others in a similar situation and also to express my feelings with friends, family, and everyone else who might be wondering how and why we do what we do.
This week my husband went back out in the field as a well-site geologist. We have lived this lifestyle before, but it has been a while. Luckily, it is only a short stint this time, and he will be back home later today for a few days before heading back to the field for a while. In short, it has been a long week, and he has been gone only a few days.
In addition to the kids taking their aggression out on me about their daddy’s departure, I am trying to put the house in order for when our new exchange student arrives and also clean up from last weekend’s roof leaking disaster. You are probably asking yourself why I would be taking in an exchange student with everything that is going on here. The answer is pretty simple. My family loves hosting, and it gives me someone of a bit more maturity to keep me company. This year, we are hosting a girl from Poland.
It has been pretty lonely here. I have been busy, and a lot of my friends are getting their children ready to go back to school. My husband is working at night, 12 hours on and 12 hours off, so I don’t get to talk to him much. Needless to say, I do feel a bit overwhelmed right now.
I think the worst part is the children’s feelings right now. I understand their frustration and everything, but it is getting increasingly hard to be patient and stay calm when they are constantly lashing out at me. I have been trying to keep them busy. Eventually, we will find our groove, but right now, the house feels like a battlefield.
I think things will be better once the house gets put back in order, and we have a daily routine established again. Hopefully, that will all happen soon.
That is pretty much life here right now. If any of my readers have a husband who is deployed, working in the oilfield, or is traveling for long periods of time for business and wants to share their experiences, please feel free to share in the comments below or contact me about writing a guest post.



  1. Jackie
    August 21, 2011 at 11:55 pm

    you didn’t tell me the next exchange student would be from Poland did you? yay!

    • bearhaven
      August 22, 2011 at 3:55 am

      I thought I did. We will have to come out and visit in the fall!

  2. Melissa Mason (@winsomsouls)
    August 23, 2011 at 1:01 pm

    Found your blog from a post you made on Disciple like Jesus. You are blessed to have a husband willing to make that sacrifice for you and your children. I know you know that just by what you posted but when things are tight, when stress is high, love him for that choice alone. It makes me thankful for men who put their families first.

    • bearhaven
      August 30, 2011 at 1:36 pm

      @Melissa, thank you. I am grateful my husband has a job and is willing to do whatever it takes. I thought this time around, I would document my experiences in hopes that it helps others.

  3. Elle @ Liberty Elle
    September 9, 2011 at 1:50 pm

    Thank you for sharing your experience. You’re right about getting the family into a routine; it definitely helps to get everyone settled into the “new” normal. Last year, my husband was training on the other side of the country for five months, leaving me to arrange our cross-country move as well as take care of the day-to-day stuff and our four kids (from 14 to 6 months old). It was lonely and overwhelming, especially when things went wrong or someone got sick, but I managed. I’m sure you’ll find that you have so much more patience and strength than you realize! Take care!

    • bearhaven
      September 13, 2011 at 1:55 am

      Elle, I definitely have more patience this time around than I did when he went out in the field the first time. It has been a bit overwhelming since he left in the middle of a big storm, and we were hoping the roof wasn’t going to leak since he just fixed it and that the basement wasn’t going to flood. Luckily, all turned out well, but I was a lot calmer this time around.

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